My Childhood Friend

From the dirty playground to a Law Firm in Chicago, we remained best friends.
My friend was my friend, with sparkling blue eyes and an alluring dimpled smile. He was adorably cute, my friend. Siamese twins, they called us. Joined by the hip ever since the day he punched Fat Freddy in the face for me. I saw him as a brother, friend and someone who was always there for me.
On my 10th birthday, he was there.
First date with Ryan Waller, it was a double date.
First trip to New York, he was there.
First heartbreak, he was there.
We were just friends, I tell you. But, of course, I was the blind one. Blind to that secretive smile he had only for me. Blind to that stare he gave me anytime I said I was fat and a bit ugly. Blind to that arm that was constantly around my waist everyday.
It wasn’t either of our faults. He told me….and I told him…and our friendship was never the same. He kept telling me, hoping to get a reaction but it just wasn’t… right. I had alway
s visualized myself with someone else and I had ALWAYS seen my friend there, giving that guy “The Talk”. For the first time, I felt utterly confused as to what my friend was thinking.
I had to.
Didn’t mean to hurt him but sometimes pain is unavoidable.
Now I have everything a girl could possibly want but I don’t have my childhood friend with me. So I couldn’t help but gasp and feel bad when my friend came back to our family reunion with a wife and 2 kids. Guess he never pictured me in his future, giving his wife stories about him…but anyway, that’s just my own side of the story..